Wives Got Distance? Part One

Feeling emotionally far away from our husbands is face it...NOT fun.

It can be demoralizing, especially as Christian women, to know we're the helpmeet and yet feel so far away from doing whatever it is we need to.

Respect our husbands....submit ourselves to them...okay great. But HOW?

In reality, there are a whole lot of us who didn't see that modeled growing up.  No offense to anyone who came before us; if they didn't have the information (having it modeled to them) then it makes sense they didn't have it to show us.

A lot of our moms were BUSY and emotionally not able to build into their marriages. Lots of our dads and granddads were taken out of the family...either by divorce, death or ideas that they weren't emotionally needed.

Or maybe feminisims' fingers crept into the family line, strangling until God's intended life is all but squeezed out.

The whole art of respecting men has been sort of lost in our culture.  I understand the concept of respect being earned...but giving it is really important as a way of extending basic human dignity.   I think a man deservers respect because He is made in God's image and God deserves our respect.  The God part of every man needs respect.

The reality of the frailty of mankind is worth noting at this point. Not every man or woman has walked as God intended. We have all fallen short of the glory of God.  Many of us have the marriages to prove it.

How can we, God's women, grafted into the family of God by the blood of our Lord Jesus, honor Him as wives to imperfect men?

It's a challenge I put before you today...because I think our culture is completely desperate, and depends on our men being the Life Givers God created them to be.

Take a look at this video to see what I mean.

Women are altruistic. At least more so than men. They will do for others.  Men? Not so much. They are born different, set on taking care of number one. They have to be taught, through extraordinary and extreme measures, HOW to care for someone other than themselves. Being a life giver as a male is something that must be learned.  A good upbringing allows these skills to be developed through appropriate, useful hardship.

Women need men to help care for the life they carry. The man's sperm is what carries life into our potential...and we need their help to care for the life we love to bring into the world. We steward the life and we need their help to do it.   I am convinced life originates with the very masculinity of men.

Often we are turned off because we experienced (or someone in our generations passed down the burden/memory/pain/abuse/fear etc) the damage when a man is not life giving.  Those moments are memorable and unfortunately can cause a rupture in the trust we are created to have.  Hopeful daughters is the hope of society.

I know there's a lot wrong going on out there and in our families and homes, churches and businesses.  

Let's be honest ladies.  There is also a lot wrong going on within us.

We sometimes don't know how to feel; we have a hard time trusting. We blame and accuse and do the opposite of respect.

We aren't always worthy of being cherished yet we long for it and sometimes demand it.

Let's be real here.

It's time to resuscitate God's ways for marriage...and it' possible even within this ungodly culture.